分享

没人分享，幸福就只剩一半。

喝一碗汤，心怎么都不够暖。

你说，会寂寞，是因为找不到可以一起分享的人。
哈，这才发现原来我们根本就是同类。要找到志同道合的朋友，好比大海捞针。
以为找到了，其实根本没有。

不是不想分享，而是想分享，别人还不一定愿意听。
所以沉默了。封闭了。心门关上了。
没有可以分享的伴，连说话都是一种浪费。

第一次觉得，如果你在，就好了。

Clinical Competency

I despise people who study medicine but think that following dress code is shit.

I started Clinical Competency in this new semester (Junior Cycle 3) and I would like to share with my readers things I have learnt from this module. As a medical student, we are expected to wear decent clothing when we attend our classes. Decent as in no skirts above knee level, no short pants, no open toes shoes, no bangles and watches, and for girls, hair exceed shoulder length must be tied neatly. Why must we do this? You think this is because the lecturers trying to create a fuss? Then you are totally wrong. We wear decent clothing because this is a safety precaution not only to ourselves and also our patients in the future. Doctors are at the highest potential risk for cross infection. Needle stick injuries are so common. How are you going to save someone else's life when you can't even protect yourself well. Imagine you wear open toes shoes and some chemicals just spill on your toes. Imagine you are having a consultation with your patient and while you are sitting down, crossing your legs and your sexy legs attract even more attention than your words. Imagine you are trying to auscultate your patient and your flying long hair is all over your patient's face. Dress codes are set for our convenience. Rules are there for a reason. And of course, when there are rules, they are meant to be followed.

Some private universities in Malaysia never had dress code, medical students just come with t-shirt, hot pants and flip flops. Yes, public universities in Malaysia have dress code, but sadly, it is due to religious reason. However, my university teaches me something. Something that other universities will never teach me - self discipline. Self discipline is so important not only in my future career, and also become a practice in my daily life. We are trained to abide to the dress code, to make us look professional when we start to serve the society, a respect to our profession and also to our patients, and most important of all, our attitudes. You can violate the rules when you graduate. Nobody is going to be there restrict what you want to wear. Attitude determines all. You want to wear mini skirts and shorts when you do medicine? Go away. You just humiliated this noble profession.

No offences.

Malaysians are disappointing.

Last Wednesday, I was waiting for KTM at KL Sentral. I was considered quite unlucky because by the time I bought my ticket, the last train just left. So I got no choice but to wait for the next train. So I was the first person queuing there. The next train took around 30 minutes to come, which made everyone starting to get very impatient. People queuing behind me started to mumble and complain. I was quite worried too because I actually needed to rush back to my university. Any delays can really make me late for classes.

So the train finally came. Many people wanted to go in/go out from the train at the same time. I believe I am a good citizen. Of course, I will have to wait at the side and allow people inside to come out from the train first. However, there were just too many people. People queuing behind me started to bypass me and entered the train first (Whatttt?) So the people inside the train were stuck and couldn't come out. And me, stood awkwardly there. Then there was this Malay guy inside the train, wanted to come out but couldn't, started to scold right in front of my face (as I was the only one standing outside the train waiting, everyone else busy squeezing into the train). ''You tak pernah belajar ke, orang keluar dulu baru masuk, tunggu sekejap pun tak boleh, sekolah tak ajar ibu bapa pun tak ajar.....''

Now tell me. What's wrong with this world? I got scolded even when I was the one who waited and gave way to the passengers. Yes, he wasn't talking about me, but the feeling of get lectured right in my face was just so awful. At the same time, I was reminded by my pleasant experience of taking Singapore's MRT. This is just too disappointing.

A day worth celebrating :)

Had been constantly following one of my colleague's blog. I love his blog because he is a good story teller and I like the way he describes the little things happening in Perdana University. He records his medical school life by having a counting to every of his post e.g The Med School Report - Day 365. Yes, he just reminded me that we have come to the 365th day of our medical school lives. I remember someone once told me, what are you scare of? One year is so short if you count it by months. Yes, one year can be really short, because it is just 12 months. But one year can be long, because it is 31557600 seconds. So many things can happen in 31557600 seconds, be it ups or downs, but I believe no cloud is so dark that the sun can't shine through. There may be things that upset you but the sadness fades, eventually. First year just passed. And I am now embracing my second year, with greater aspirations. They say, if your dreams don't scare you, they are not big enough.

19th September is Perdana University's official Founder's Day. Thus, like my colleague, I would also like to wish my university a very Happy Birthday. I will continue to be proud of you and make you proud one day.

Eye Contact Attraction

You know at times, from someone's eyes you can read his/her mind. Mind-readers enter your mind through your eyes. Liars exposed themselves if they show rapid eye movements. Love at first sight means 8.2 seconds of eye contact. Let's do some eyes practice, too!

Learn to use your eyes to their full potential:
Make constant eye contact when in conversation. Looking away (especially down) is a sign of inferiority and uncertainty. Instead, look at your conversation partner dead in the eyes and keep them locked on.

Master the piercing stare. You know when someone looks at you and it feels like they can see into your soul? Well that’s not a hereditary characteristic, it just takes practice. Work on sharpening your gaze in the mirror. You’ll know you have it when it’s intimidating to continue looking at yourself.

The Trio

I miss the three of us. Like very, very much.

I hope the trio is still there.

Comfort Zone

Wanted to write something about the new chapter of my life but I realise they are a bit here and there and I don't know how to organise it into a story. So I think I would just highlight one of the epic story happened on me in this very first week of my new semester. The story is quite straight forward and simple la. Throw you a question here and you will get me: What would you do, if you shower halfway and suddenly no water?

This whole story begins when I moved into my new house. It is a town house and I am living in the upper unit. This resulting in my house having really POOR water pressure. That is why I didn't feel very weird when I shower halfway and the water started to become smaller and smaller. But not when the water stopped completely! I was like, ah crap. So I took all my toiletries and went to the other bathroom downstairs to continue to bathe. God knows how lucky I was. Once again, the water stopped! Hell no. I never thought this kind of thing can happen on me. My house mates were all upstairs. So I can only...shouted for help. House mates couldn't figure out why the water suddenly stopped too. So I was left naked in the bathroom with soaps on me somemore. I think I was already calm and steady enough because I didn't scream or did any other stupid things. Lol.

My house mates gave me 2 options, to either wrap myself in towel and go to guys' unit to continue my bath (NO NO this shouldn't even be an option), or they helped me to carry water to my bathroom. Although I very much didn't want to trouble my house mates, I chose the second option. Hence the whole story ended awkwardly. (It was found out later that our water pipe was closed by someone don't know accidentally or we actually had enemies and it was a prank. Lol.)

That is why sometimes I hate to change. To change, you must be ready to face all these kind of things which are totally out of your expectation. Yes, new house is comfy and big and near to university and good environment and no mosquitos and good food is just around me. But somehow I just miss my old place where I don't have to face water problem, everything is ready there, house mates are just studying beside you but not separated now by the tall wall,  and I even have a beautiful lake where I can jog whenever I want. Sometimes I really do wish I can stay in my comfort zone forever.

Crown me the queen of indecisiveness

Curiosity doesn't kill. Indecisive kills. I remember I have emphasised before that I hate people who can't make no matter big or small decisions in their lives. That is why sometimes I can be really mad at myself. To the extent that I hope I can give myself a slap or hang myself to death instead. I can die. I wasn't born with silver spoons or gold spoons or whatever spoon in my mouth. When I was young I have been taught by my family that every single cent must be spent wisely and we never splurge on buying branded stuffs. I wouldn't deny this part of me made me into who I am now, who is extremely indecisive when it comes to money.
Story begins. I needed to purchase something so these are the steps that I did.


1. I asked my friend who is familiar with this for recommendations of brands and shops. So he gave me a few recommendations which were having promotions.

2. Google-ed (yes Google is my best friend that I can't live without) the recommendation of my friend (no no I swear it was not because I don't trust my friend).

3. Went to the shop for the first time and confirmed everything that was shown on their websites are correct. Went back without purchasing.

4. Stared at the brochure at home for countless time and think and think and think. Went back to the websites to recheck the dateline of the promotion and think and think and think. Passed by the shop a few times and think and think and think.

5. Finally decided to purchase (on the last day of the promotion period somemore wth). Went to the shop  and asked again all the details. Don't know why started to consider again, although I came telling myself that I would purchase this today (I am serious!). Okay lah I would just buy. Told the salesperson that I wanted this package and gave my IC to him for final registration. While the salesperson was keying in my personal details, I wondered what struck me at that moment and I yelled: Stop! I decided not to purchase. Let me go home and consider about it. Got my IC back. Went home empty-handed.


Story ends. Someone please tell me what was wrong with me.

Extended version of the story:
6. Promotion period has over and I am now regretting for not purchasing it. FML.

Food for thought.