It is hard to let go of stuff.
We all have things that we have become attached to and would feel deprived without. It all started when a child couldn't sleep without his favourite bolster/blanket/toys. The perfect example is me. I am still using the same bolster that I have been using for more than 10 years. And I bring it everywhere I go. My confession is: I have strong emotional attachment to inanimate objects, all the time. I have that sense of guilt for throwing away a pair of worn-out shoes. I feel sorry for the food when the food is thrown away. Terribly upset when something is broken/destroyed. I always let my teddy bear sit on my bed properly and I forbid my friends from bullying him - he feels the pain. I still remember how long I have been emo-ing over my damaged headphones 2 years back, because it was given by my friend and I really treasured it. And now. Just yesterday. I lost another gift.
''It's only objects. Why react so extremely?''
But I couldn't help and the threat of loss of the object triggered anxiety. I started panicking and blaming myself and tearing up and I swear at that moment my mental age regressed by at least a decade. I feel....incomplete.
Perhaps I am destined to be an emotional creature. And I am stubborn like that.
Eunice, somehow I think I'm very similar to you in many ways. I remember how I felt so sad when I lost my favourtite eraser in the class when I was 8, I felt so guilty that I can't even take good care of my eraser and I can't stop imagine that it might be lying at somewhere dark and dirty. Ever since then, I swear I will take good care of my personal stuffs. I checked and made sure everything was in place before I left the class everyday, I became kind of anxious back then. Same goes to the food, I get angry when I see people throwing food away just because they think they're not yummy enough, I feel so bad because there're so many people all over the world struggling so hard for food.
ReplyDeleteHahaha my turn to confess here >.<
Omg! Are your reading back my old post hahaha. Glad that I found another emotional creature hehe.
DeleteOpps被發現了！ Actually I spent some time to read your posts all the way back to 2010, I know you better now Eunice >.< You're such an awesome girl and you really can write very well, I will definitely support you if you publish your own book one day ^^ Also, I'm surprised to find that we're similar in many ways hehe~ Eunice 加油！ :)
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